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St. Peter says “This will be yours for eternity. You can live in that castle with servants to wait on you hand and foot, and you can have everything you want.”The bus driver looks and St. Peter and says “Well, now, don’t think I’m not grateful, but shouldn’t the priest get all this, not me? Shouldn’t I get the cottage and 50 acres instead?”St. Peter just laughs and says “The reason you get all this is because when the priest preached, everyone fell asleep. Now, when you drove your bus, people prayed!”If aliens are smart enough to travel through space, why do they keep abducting the dumbest people on Earth?Why is it that when you talk to God you’re praying, but when he talks to you, you’re crazy?Seen on a bumper sticker: “Old age is inevitable; growing up is optional.”My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong, and she agrees with me.The reason men lie is because women ask so many questions.Would a disaffected member of Generation X be a highly-motivated and successful. . damnation! We're stuck with her," Stevie said.Ricky leered.She passed."She's cute." He said.He morphed into Rick Nelson after his Army service in Germany. Although the change caused her a moment of discomfort, she was an avid Nick at Night fan and knew all of Nelson's reruns ... Ricky Nelson suited her to a Tee.She stuttered, sniffed, choked a little. Ricky offered a glass of water and watched her drink it.He handed her a kleenex and made sure she blew her nose.Then he patted her on the back while she cleared her lungs. She folded herself into his loving embrace ... he took her like a Venus flytrap, Dionaea muscipula, seizes a fly.Stevie grinned, 'My little brother just grew up.' "Nx 9637 ... diagnose patient please." Please refer to me by Captain David's designation," said the AI/ship/HAL."What did he call you?" Stevie asked."HAL," said the AI/ship/HAL."Any idea why HAL?" asked Stevie."Earth Science Fiction book and movie," as if that explained it all.Evidently, it was good enough..
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