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"Name and Tarzan status, please!" I'm Nina", I said. That was the easy part. I mentally shrugged. Well, nothing ventured, "No Tarzan". I paused and took a deep breath. "You see I'm gay". I waited for the reaction."I see", said Sam, who smiled and never moved her hand."Okay", smiled Jane. "Well I'd like to propose a toast. To the three oddballs out."I was surprised but very pleased with their relaxed acceptance of my statement. Jane, although I might have been imagining it, seemed to have a bit of a twinkle in her eyes. Sam was simply smiling calmly and squeezed my arm briefly before picking up her drink. I smiled shyly at both of them and then we all laughed and said together "To the three oddballs!"Over the next hour we had several more drinks and proceeded to become friends. I explained about Robert. We talked all about our jobs and places we had been and would like to go. Sam showed pictures and told stories of her husband and grown children. Jane told about breaking up with her. Yet I couldn't possibly believe they applied to Maddie and me. Though we had an argument now and then like any couple, they seemed to be the kind that clear the air instead of injure. In all seven years together I couldn't recall a single time that our differences had descended to attacking each other instead of the issue at hand, and I truly believed we both felt safe expressing our concerns to each other without fear of rebuke or retribution. And as recently as the night before we had joined in sex and it was beyond argument that our intensity and pleasure then had been far and away greater than what I saw before me.I became increasingly convinced that this wasn't the product of any deep-seated resentment; it must be a fluke, a momentary loss of control, and perhaps something that could be dealt with more easily than I'd thought - not without pain, but less painfully than it could have been. And that calmed me further. The biting pang of betrayal was by no means lifting but it was.
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