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Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart...Dear Mrs. Harris,Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are “documented by our video surveillance cameras”:1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, ‘Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned. Perhaps some more discussion of his latest work would be forthcoming...Morty looked down the list of incoming messages, mentally ordering which ones to read first - when he came to a stop, his beady little eyes widening in shock as he read the header on the third from the bottom.'Hey, stupid.' - from Gunslinger.What worried him so much wasn't the message - hell, he'd read that morning's rant with joy.But this wasn't posted to the list - it had come directly to HIM. Gunslinger knew who he was.For a second, Morty considered just dumping the message into the trash - but his ego stopped him. So, there might be a 'revenge' virus in the message. Wasn't he, Mortimer J. Viral the best hacker, cracker and phreak there was? Some piddly-assed writer trying to beat him at his own game would be in for a rude surprise.Shaking his head, Morty clicked on the file....*****On that cue, the rest of the pre-programmed 'trap' sprung to life.The medical database at the Knowaire General Hospital obligingly.
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