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Paul pulled out a work order and looked up at us. "Ready to go?" Sure. Let me tell my ride though." No prob. We'll meet you our front."I thanked them and headed out to let Sarah know. She was thrilled for me and gave me a hug. Paul, Tony, pulled up a couple minutes later in a big truck with another woman who was introduced as Marge. She asked when she should pick me up. Tony said he'd give me a ride home, which was nice of him. Sarah thought that was okay, so it reassured me. She gave me another hug and waved as we drove off.As we drove I asked about the hours and what we'd do when school starts. They explained that there wouldn't be much after school started. By the time, Tony and I got there they'd be finishing up for the day. Mostly we'd just work weekends and the occasional Friday night, if we had to go somewhere. It was a bit of a bummer but still 8 hours a day twice a week at 20 dollars an hour isn't something to sneeze at. Of course it'll screw up the family breakfasts but I. Still, there you are, dominating my thoughts. Today, when my life has settled, when my nest is complete, and I have time to think, I spend most of my extra time thinking about you. There is a part of me that longs to break my promises in this life I have chosen. There are several parts of me that want to run away, to you. And yet, another part of me wonders if I am the biggest fool on earth for even thinking you care about me after all these years. I will never know if you only wish to watch me suffer like this, or if you also feel the burning desire to be together, again. It would serve me right if it is merely amusement for you. I loved you with every ounce of my being, from the very moment we became girlfriend and boyfriend as kids. Perhaps it’s biological. Perhaps women can never really shut off that part of us that longs for our first true loves. I’ve had two or three loves since then, but they were easily wiped out of my mind in time. You have been branded into my soul in a way.
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