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‘I wasn’t sleeping. I was shielding my eyes from the glare of that bathing suit. You could signal aircraft with that thing.’ ‘Hey, this thing cost a lot of money, I’ll have you know.’ I was about to make another no doubt witty rejoinder, but she cut me off by flicking the skirt in my face and starting toward the door. ‘I’m getting hungry,’ she said. So was I, by now. I hadn’t eaten anything all day thanks to the hangover and now that she mentioned it, I was starving. ‘Where do you want to go?’ ‘I think I’d rather just order out,’ she said. ‘The drinks and the sun have made me logy. Do you mind?’ ‘I don’t mind at all. I don’t really feel like going out either.’ ‘So what shall we order? I think I’d like Thai.’ ‘Me too, then.’ We ordered the food and while we waited for it to arrive, Colleen had a shower and I sat on the couch in front of the TV and flipped through the channels until I found a baseball game. When the food arrived, Colleen was still in the shower, so I paid the guy and. Instead, you get a puppy and are quite happy with your choice to leave all your life’s nagging questions behind. Because sometimes you fuck up, even with good intentions halfway in mind. You start digging a hole for yourself and keep on digging even when you know you’re dead wrong. Then someone comes along and asks you a really profound question – something mind-bending like ‘why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?’ – and you’re left so completely befuddled not even another pint of Guinness clears away the rain in your brain. And just when you think the world couldn’t possibly be any more pointless and fucked-up you hear there are going to be a bunch of faculty laid-off over the summer, even tenured profs like you. Your stomach burns, you can’t sleep, but by that point the puppy has eaten all your running shoes and what the fuck, where would you run to, anyway? Then one night you run in a girl so completely different your whole world comes unglued. Paradigm shifts don’t mean a thing.
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