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Shit!! She could barely get her mother's vibrator in there and that was only six inches long and not much bigger around than a Vienna sausage.Little Debbie's parents were starting to worry about her. "There's no question she's oversexed" her mother blurted out one morning at the kitchen table. Her dad responded with "No shit, Dick Tracy". What gave you you the first clue? Was it watching her finger herself while she watches television? Was it seeing her rub herself off against the doorknobs? Maybe it was when she tried to tickle her tonsils with those popsickles last week?"Little Debbie's mother didn't bother to dignify such crude comments with an answer. Besides, the real reasons for her concern were the various and sundry bathroom items left lying around with oily, female secretions coating their handles. Toothbrushes, hairbrushes and even a half eaten carrot, to name just a few. No question about it, Little Debbie was one horney little female. With her barely curved little body,. I need you, this world needs you.”Gaia spoke some more while we sat as the sun slowly went toward the horizon. “I am Gaia and over the centuries I have tried to care for this world. As humans became so widespread and so creative, I thought I could keep abreast of the changes. But I have been fighting a losing battle for the past century. I know you understand this because your courses of study in school have been the Earth, Climatology with particular emphasis on Climate Change. My victories have started getting fewer and farther between. I finally appeal for help and you were formed. The powers-that-be told me about you and sent me to find you.”“Powers-that-be? Gods?”“Not in the way human religion thinks of those powers. But more a sense of balance in the Universe. When the balance is disrupted, the powers take action. They realized I needed help and they sent you.”“Just the two of us?”“No, you will have help. There will be . . . you would call them Muses . . . to help you. A friend.
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