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Gargling and coughing like a cat, I could feel imaginary hairballs gathering on my tongue. “Really? No?” “I said no.” What was he thinking? It’s not cotton candy; it doesn’t melt in your mouth before you swallow. It doesn’t blow away like tumbleweed. Hair just sits there awaiting its removal by means of a strong cough and a throat wash. My Gawd! “C’mon, let’s leave it out of dessert tonight. Okay? “No worries.” No worries for Jon; my Oreo cookie is well groomed. Damn! And like clockwork, here’s the server to interrupt my ka-billionth plea for Jon to shave, or at the very least, groom his goodies. “Here’s your tiramisu and your coffee. Sir, can I get you anything?” “Yes, would you bring a fresh napkin, a second fork, and a cup of regular coffee... black please.” “Sure thing.” The server’s return and departure were swift. She settled the items on the table. Silent, she left the check and vanished. I was certain she sensed the naughty about to go down. Jon handled the linen napkin. "Care to try that one again?" he asked coldly. "You had an appointment with Julie tonight. You were blackmailing Julie. You were giving Julie drugs. So what happened to Julie tonight, you piece of shit?"When Bobby let up enough on his throat for him to speak, he replied frantically, "I didn't do anything to her!" he protested. "She went crazy, man. She had a gun, and she fucking shot me!" You don't look shot to me," Bobby replied softly. Van didn't know which Bobby to be more afraid of — when Bobby spoke loudly, or when he spoke softly. He suspected the soft spoken Bobby was probably the one he should fear the most."She did! The bullet hit my cigarette case!" he cried. "That's the only reason she didn't kill me. Look, I can show you, it's in my pocket!"Van pulled the case out and held it up. Bobby took a glance at it and put it in a pocket of his jeans."So what happened after that?" asked Bobby in a voice so soft that Van had to strain to hear it."Nothing! I just got the fuck out of.
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