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This is a fact, but my brain has yet to accept it. You’ve been gone nearly two months but I’ve only just found out. I spent the last two months staying positive, keeping myself from losing confidence. I’ve been thinking of you as alive and still fighting. I ignored the ugly feelings that something was wrong. You weren’t responding to anything. I convinced myself you were spending your precious energy on those wonderful children, who matter more than me. I can only hope that is true, that your last days were spent surrounded by your children and family. I still think you were strong enough to beat the cancer. Losing the baby and the final expiration of your marriage were heavy enough hits. Topped with the ugly cherry of such an aggressive cancer, you were up against too much. Losing much needed love and support in the face of such a daunting trial would do anyone in. Part of me feels a deep overwhelming pain, loss. There is an ache inside that only time will cure. It’s been fueled. The new streetcar line goes as far south as Union Station, linking the Crossroads with downtown and the West Bottoms neighborhood on the other side of those fucking freeways. The futuristic streetcar is free too. I want to see it expand as far south as Waldo. And east too, to poorer neighborhoods with people who would really benefit from the transport. And, out to that fucking airport way north of the river.Fuck you, you NIMBY people. Selfish pricks.Downtown, like the Crossroads, is another marketing success now called the Power & Light District, named after the art deco utility building.So ... south to north, Waldo, Brookside, Plaza, Westport, Crossroads, Power & Light. Then those fucking freeways, stab wounds in the heart of my city.My seventh neighborhood, the West Bottoms, lies north of those ugly freeways. Between the freeways and the Missouri River. It consists of the stockyards to the west and River Market a bit east.Abandoned office buildings, warehouses, and factories have.
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