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“Oh, well I don’t tend to carry around books, especially magical ones,” the goat admits. “Being the unmagical type, I don’t see a need for them. I can’t even read, you see?”“No, no, no,” the girl says, stamping her foot. “I hoped you would know where the second book was.”“Oh. Why didn’t you say so?” he asks.“I did,” she says.Actually, you didn’t.“Well, I’m a little old you see, and my mind ain’t what it used to be,” Billy Gruff says. “Maybe there’s a way you can help jog it a little.”Oh, no. Don’t tell me he talking about what I think he’s talking about.“What do you mean?” Penelope asks, referring to Hazel rather than the goat on the rock.But Old Gruff interprets it as she is talking to him. He picks up a stick and poles it under Penelope’s dress, lifting it up a little. “I think a little of the magical pussy could do wonders on my memory.”Oh no, he means what I thought he meant.Penelope drops her head, looking a little shy. Her eyes dart down to the welcome package between his. '"Short Arse Syndrome" I thought as I looked down at the almost frothing man. Rather than say what I thought, I did try to calm the situation. 'Look, Maureen and I are having a quiet drink in a busy pub, we are old... 'I never got chance to finish as he stepped forward and aimed a quick jab at my abdomen. Because I was expecting that, or at least something like that, I was able to deflect it. All this did was rile him even more.'Excuse me sir, I must ask you to leave the premises at once.' I heard a female voice say firmly. I instantly recognised it as that of the landlady Betty Pritchard. The guy turned sharply and before anyone could move hit her across the face with the back of his hand.'Piss off cunt, I'll leave when I've sorted this other cunt out and not before.' He screamed as he hit her.That was a huge mistake on his part. Betty was well loved and had been running the "Dog" for almost a decade. Needless to say, in any decent boozer, there are many regulars of all shapes and.
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