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Have you heard the one about the agnostic dyslectic insomniac?He lay awake all night wondering if there was a dog or not... A man walks into a pastry shop and orders 5 pies, 3 sausage rolls and 2 cakes. As he leaves the shop he stumbles across a homeless man on the footpath who says, “I haven’t eaten for two days”, to which the man with the pastries replies; “I wish I had your willpower”!!!Jack: Just bought a hearing-aid for two dollars!Jill: What kind is it?Jack: Quarter past ten.A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.Tech support: Are you running it under windows?Customer: “No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.”A string walked into a bar and climbed up onto a stool. The bartender came over and said, “Hey you! We don’t serve strings in here. Get out!” The string got down and went outside where he wound himself up into a tight ball and. Something must have shown in my face because she added, "Jojo, don't worry, you're not in trouble." I looked at her and saw that, to my surprise, Tina seemed nervous; maybe she'd found the Koala-snot Soup Restaurant. "I, um, I guess I wondered if you hadn't booked leave because you haven't any holiday planned." The relief that I felt was now mixed with curiosity."No, I haven't anything planned. Actually, I don't really have the money to afford a summer holiday this year," I admitted, a little embarrassed. "Are you worried that I'll have too much leave left at the end of the year? I can take some days off and just, I don't know, do some studying at home or..." No no, Jojo, it's nothing like that," she interrupted and then hesitated. "I'd booked a holiday for two, for Alex and me but..." there was real sadness in her face and I had a faint inkling of what might be coming as she sighed, "the weekend before last Alex left me. I guess it's been on the cards for a while really." I.
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